Question: Actually, lots of them.

So it’s come to this: in our impending move cross-country, we must decide where to land. And that question is and will remain up in the air for awhile, as we gather information. We are true research geeks. My husband and I are both so very much into collecting data that when I went into labor with my son, my husband insisted we take a ton of data points before calling the doctor. I was losing control of my bodily functions at the time, and took issue with his thoroughness.

But I digress.

We’re in possession of flyers, brochures and the vast expanse of the Internet for information. We have too much data, and not enough. Because information is not weighted on the Web. Even when you think you’re getting some real person’s experience and rating on a school or restaurant, you’re not. Because the reviews are not written by real people, in the sense of people who aren’t being paid to write reviews. Sure, some are genuine; but many are fake hype that the sponsoring company paid for to make them look good. Spin doctors for preschools? Apparently.

So you can’t really be sure what to believe, nor should you extend your trust to any Mom, Dick or Harry who post a sterling review of something you’re interested in.

What we’re up against is the ridiculous luxury of the tyranny of choice. We have narrowed it down to two areas in which we might live, but the two are so different that we’re totally torn about the whole thing.

One choice fits in with the whole AsGap ™ mentioned in yesterday’s post. One neighborhood is the place we aspire to be comfortable and hip in. The other is one we actually probably WILL be comfortable (but not so hip) in. Should we make the courageous choice or the predictable one? And what’s so wrong with predictable, if you know it will make you happy? And aren’t we being courageous by taking the leap of faith of going to a start-up company across the country in a much smaller job market for both my husband and I, and maybe even buying a freakin’ house? That takes courage, doesn’t it?

Am I just battling cognitive dissonance here because I want to take the “safe” choice, or am I being smart and/or sensible?

The one choice is urban, eclectic, and therefore exciting. But the schools suck. So we’d actually (gasp) be considering private schools. But I have a really hard time reconciling myself to paying an entire year’s salary to put my children in private school when I can live eight miles away and put them in excellent public schools. But the excellent public schools aren’t as diverse, and the community is smaller and more homogenous. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but both my husband and I grew up in very heterogenous environments, and we want that for our kids.

But we DON’T want our kids to go to private school. I’m admittedly very biased about that. In Montreal, where I grew up, the only kids who went to private school were either regular French kids or the (usually rich) Anglo kids who got kicked out of public school. The English private schools in Montreal were for snotty entitled kids or really “bad” kids who couldn’t hack the excellent public schools that existed. So do I want to perceive my children as bad or entitled? Hell no.

But I’m probably being way too myopic about this. There are surely some private schools that are not full of delinquent and/or entitled kids. Plus, I kind of like delinquent kids; they’re usually smart and rebellious. I always enjoyed teaching them in the public school I worked in.

But back to the AsGap™. (Is the ™ annoying yet? Just checking.) We want to be the parents who totally culturally enrich our children AND send them to public schools, but apparently we can’t have both in the area to which we’re moving. And if I sound like an elitist, forgive me. I’m a product of the California cultural conditioning I’ve lived in these past ten years. If you’re a parent today, at least out here, it’s ALL about the school. And I suspect that’s true in many places elsewhere.

So what will it be? Stay tuned.