Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Comment: Turtlenecks are back!

At least, for me.

In this new wintry climate.

With no furnace.

So, yes, I’ve rediscovered turtlenecks; I wore them when I was little, and in fact once in seventh grade had to wear one to hide a curling iron burn which obnoxious boys were claiming was a hickey. (As if. I barely knew what a hickey was, and was mortified at the thought.) (Whereas today’s tweens are probably giving hickeys in fourth grade, right? Augh.)

Anyway, turtlenecks were on my clothing rotation back in my Canadian childhood. But since moving to Southern California, I eschewed anything with a neckline higher than my clavicle, and hadn’t looked back.

Until today. Since I now live in a colder climate. With no heat. Did I mention that?

In fact, I am wearing a turtleneck right now.

I feel so hipster/dufus/beat poet. Like I should be in a café scatting or something.

But see, for years even if I had WANTED to wear a turtleneck, I couldn’t have.

I had this little gag thing.

It started when I was pregnant. I couldn’t even wear a necklace when I was pregnant. If you brushed your hand within three feet of my neck, I gagged.

If a commercial came on TV, I gagged. (but for slightly different reasons)

I gagged when I got dressed and pulled something over my head.

Button up shirts? No way.

Turtlenecks? Not. Not. Not.

So this is a return to an earlier time. I didn’t even realize middle-aged women wore them, though if LL Bean and Land's End are any indication, I should have. I thought seniors and babies wore them, and the babies’ are onesies, natch. I do not need a snap on crotch part for my turtleneck, thanks very much.

I feel a bit like Carl Sagan, or my Dad in the 70s, with these, but maybe I'm gonna try to make this work for me.

My fashion possibilities are endless! I can layer! I can wear turtlenecks in different colors! After all, turtlenecks are neither punk nor preppy. I’m not sure what they are.

But I’m willing to find out.

Won’t you join me on this journey?

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