Comment: Clothes Make the Mama

It’s important to have a reason to get dressed up once in awhile. Or at least change out of your sweats. I just finished reading Sandra Tsing Loh’s hilarious “Mother on Fire” and she makes a very specific point about our fashion sense as mothers. She talks about he ubiquitous sweat pants/loungewear/jammies seen on mamas from far and wide as they rush in and out of their cars picking up, dropping off, running errands, and sweating.

I’ve always been sweaty, but having children has brought my sweatatory glands up to gladiator status; man, a river runs through it, and I’m not even in peri-menopause yet (err, at least I think so, I’ll get back to you on that).

Anyway, the whole mother fashion thing. I know there’s a movement of young, urban, hip moms who drop nearly a grand on their bugaboo strollers and have matching Babystyle outfits with their offspring, but in the real world? We’re in sweats, or other outfits with generous elastic and forgiving seams.

The first two years of my son’s life I wore nothing but sweat suits. If you had told me when I was pregnant that I would be doing that, I would have both laughed and mocked. But I was already on the slippery slope of default-mama fashion. I was wearing floral maternity tops. Gah! Floral! It wasn’t that far to slip into velour sweat suits (me and George Costanza).

So I guess what I’m saying is, most of us end up in sweats unless/until we go back to work outside the home. If you’re lucky/brave enough to stay home full time with your kids, then your fashion range is, shall we say, limited. I looked at my closet and saw things that looked so alien to me, because I hadn’t worn them in SIX years. And there’s no sign of my wearing them anytime soon, if they even fit (which they may not) (Shut up! Only a woman can call herself fat with no consequences.)

When I’m cruising the aisles of Target and Old Navy, from whence all my children’s (and mine, and my husband’s) clothes come, I will on occasion see what I call “Teacher Clothes”, which are things I would wear if I were teaching, which is the job I held before I had my kids. I look longingly at the fabric and think, yes, those would be cute, I could wear them when I’m around grown ups, and other people with whom I can make sustained eye contact. I will wear make up and possibly shoes with heels, and funky earrings, and I will sit on an adult-sized chair.

So I think that some days, a person should dress up a little, just to keep the cool/swank dressing skills from atrophying. Maybe it will feel weird to wear full makeup and earrings for a play date, but what choice do we have? I say, dress up once a week at least. Let your children get used to you with eyeliner! Let them see you wearing shoes that aren’t rubber-soled! Show your children there’s more to life than fleece!

You owe it to yourself and your family, and your nation. Get dressed up!