OH CANADA!

Yes, I'm writing about hockey.

No, I didn't watch the big Olympic final. I don't get TV stations and my husband couldn't find it on the Internet live streaming. But I know CANADA WON. I know it happened in overtime. It must have been an exciting game.

But the truth of it is...

I don't like hockey.

There, I said it. I feel much better now.

I know I'm SUPPOSED to like hockey because I'm CANADIAN.

But I just DON'T.

It takes a combination of skills I don't have, and I'm sure it's exciting but it's so damn violent. I can't stand the fighting. I'm not a Quaker, but I play one on TV. I'm just not into violence.

I'm really glad Canada won, though. Can you imagine the shit Canadians would take for the next four years? What would have happened if the Americans had beaten the Canadians?

The whole universe might have imploded onto itself or some such physics nightmare.

It does make me proud to be Canadian, but that's kind of ridiculous, given that I really don't care for hockey. But it also makes me quintessentially Canadian. Because I'm ambivalent about the whole thing. And if you look up ambivalence in the dictionary, the maple leaf will be there.

Go Canada! Please stop beating the crap out of each other. Thanks.